After riding off into the sunset in just about the most perfect way imaginable , we knew what Kobe Bryant planned to do: work out in the morning , head over to the Kobe Inc. offices , and get to work on branding, or storytelling, or telling stories about branding. Following a couple of nose-to-the-grindstone weeks, though, the former Los Angeles Lakers legend and future first-ballot Hall of Famer found some time for a bit of fun, making his first post-retirement media appearance in a visit to "Ellen" to discuss the emotions of that unforgettable night, among other things. [ Follow Dunks Don't Lie on Tumblr: The best slams from all of basketball] (You can watch the full five-minute interview here .) Those "other things" included flexing his straight-man comedic chops in a hidden-camera prank that saw him describe to an unsuspecting esthetician, in somewhat excruciating detail, the extent of an imaginary sweating problem that he claimed plagued him over the course of his playing career, with host Ellen DeGeneres feeding him fake nicknames like "Sir Sweats-A-Lot" and "Sweat Middler" through an earpiece: "It starts on my left upper cheek — my buttocks. Starts dripping down to my...